Tag Archives: Cat

Word of the Year

I’ve been taken in by the idea of choosing a word to live by this year discovered via the She Loves Magazine. http://shelovesmagazine.com/

Actually the word chose me as I’ve been struggling my way through a rather large decision regarding the next steps in my life.  As a mid-lifer, one who may live to be over 100 if the mid-life part is true, I’ve recently let go of a job I’ve enjoyed for the past 14 years on a part time basis.  As a companion care giver for the senior population, I grew to value all the life stories, adventures, traumas, joys and anguish so many people have experienced.  I want to follow that path and leave a legacy of a life well lived.  Thus it has prepared me for whatever comes next.

Always eager to learn, I’m wrestling with getting more education and wondering about the necessity of it, what it could/should look like, why I need more, why I want more or why I’m feeling urged to seek more.  Oodles of questions get raised, too often in the middle of the night when I, and my cat and my husband would rather I be sleeping.

Then of course is the desire to write more, how-what-when-why-how…have entered into the 35th year of married life and wonder what new trails we can blaze and wonder how long the fire will last.

I serve in a ministry called Freedom Session, http://www.freedomsession.com/

and think about how much to time to give away, when it would be a great idea to find a new source of income.

Then in the midst of all the whirl of words that bounce around in my head, my thoughts are taken to one word, SURRENDER.  The word came in the middle of a restless night when I simply and quietly said in a prayer, I surrender.  In the morning I prayed this same prayer.

On my way to an event I got in my car and flipped my new CD on and clicked through a few songs until I landed on one with some soothing music and I found my self carried away with the following song.

I have been given my word.

Peace and clarity have come. My unknowns can be faced with surrender.

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Christmas morn…

Today’s Tip:  Don’t Give Up…

After rising way too early today (4am), I decided to put some recent learning to good use and post a blog.  I managed to retrieve a picture and insert it into my post and then I wanted to tell the beginning of my Christmas story.  With one wrong button pushed, my snowy photo disappeared and could not be found.

With time still available I forged ahead without the photo and pushed out around 500 words explaining just how I had gotten myself into such a confused blog/picture/post/laptop/new windows/learning curve dilemma.  I was really getting into the mode of having a great time writing and decided to ‘save draft’.  That was when I was told I had no internet connection.

Huh….what was that supposed to mean?

Well,  it meant not only had my photo gone into who knows where – in space, my well groomed and patiently expressed words of my not so perfect story time were also gone.  I had really liked the part about me whisper-yelling at the laptop in order to not wake up my little household, but that image has been lost too.

I didn’t exactly slam down the lid on my still too new to me Asus laptop, but I did give the screen a good tongue lashing and let it know how disgusted I was with the performance thus far. Then I closed the lid and slid the computer out of sight before I did any damage to it.

And, on Christmas Day too…sheesh!  I was just trying to recall my memories, sit quiet and not disturb the cat sleeping at my feet and the husband crashed out down the hall.  Speaking of husband – when he appeared and sat groggily listening to my rant of what the computer did to me today, he very nicely let me know it is a good idea to regularly click on the ‘save draft’ area of my screen and then I’d be able to retrieve my ‘words’.

It was then I remembered the teaching experience of my new young friend who is coaching me along on this journey of my laptop and WordPress blog.  She too has stressed the importance of this little feature.  I have learned the hard way – again.

I am going to try again to do my step by step instructions of moving a picture/resizing it then inserting it into my blog post.

Just not today.   Merry Christmas…

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One Step at a Time

Time.  As I’ve aged, sometimes fear has crept in, wondering what I’d do with my time, my minutes, hours, days, weeks, months and years remaining.  I’ve imagined myself sitting on a couch using the TV as my companion, my cat as my only communication with others, the phone or doorbell never ringing, adult children I never see and holidays that come and go.

It would be a very lonely way to spend the end of life years  but it is the life of many people, many seniors I’ve visited over the last decades of my working with them.  Working in a job I did not design for myself but rather stumbled into when I needed work I began to meet those who needed extra care, cleaning done, meals made, visiting, a walk around the block, a pat on the cheek, a hug and some love.

Now that I am changing direction and ‘retired’ from looking after the elderly I’m recognizing I was given a gift – the opportunity to love those that are sometimes forgotten.   In return I’ve been loved.  Accepted.  Trusted.  I am grateful.

Though some of you are no longer here, some of you need more care than I can give, and likely none of you will ever read this post, I want to say thank you.  In the midst of my entering your homes, your most vulnerable spaces and needs, I was given tools on how to age with dignity because you showed the way.  Thank you.

I’m changing direction and opening doors of opportunity and peeking in…more than that I’ve taken a couple of steps inside to see what is there because the view wasn’t clear enough.  I see there is more for me to do, experience, learn, explore and I am about to swing wide the door and embrace the next step.

Today, the rush in my head feels like there is not enough time to accomplish all that needs doing but it’s all good and I’m going to have a great day.  No time to sit on the couch…

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Thomas The Cat

Tabby Cat

Thomas the Cat

Picture this: Fall day, fireplace on, cat curled up on floor by the fire snoozing and me curled up in a chair across from him writing with laptop on lap, of course.   Thomas has been my companion for nearly 2 years and he has given me a reason to extend myself to another, to love, feed, nurture and give him a home.  He was rescued from the SPCA who had taken him in after being abandoned by his owner – him, his mate and a litter of babies.  I could only take him.

Some days I worry about him.  I spend equal amounts of time thinking about him, having moved him into that space in my brain, after husband and kids.  I think he needs a companion besides me but where I live, this is not allowed so I buy him toys, things that wiggle, flash lights and roll around and rattle.

I am concerned he may be depressed.  Can cats become depressed?  I sit with him, cuddle, pet, brush and I throw his favorite ratty mouse over and over and he fetches, he really does, then drops it at my feet to throw it again. He sleeps at the foot of my bed, on the bed. He sleeps a lot.

He loves me and I like that.  I like being needed…comes from training I suppose, being so needed when raising little children and it is hard to let go of, so this is my thinking, God created cats for empty-nesting mothers.

Thomas will sit for a treat, he will sit up with paws in the air, and he follows me from room to room just to see what I’m doing.  That is love…or perhaps he just thinks I might also have treats in those rooms too.

But when he lays on the floor, with head on paw and just looks at me as I wander back and forth, sighs and then looks away, that is when I worry and think he is depressed.  But then, I think – I think too much.

I had hoped for less cleaning of the house once the kids left but I’ve discovered this cat sheds a lot of his presence all over the house and it seems I am required to dust and vacuum more than this empty-nester wants.  I even wipe his nose drippings off the windows, more than when I had little kids doing similar face bumps against the glass.

However, having Thomas greet me at the door, with his smile and hello, who runs to his scratching post to work out the kinks he created while sleeping away his time while I was gone, then speak in cat language until I give him a treat or a meal and give me thanks by licking my toes, or walking across the laptop to let me know he’d like to snuggle is so worth a few thousand cat hairs drifting around the house.

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Filed under A Cat's Life