There’s been a word chasing me.
It’s January and time to choose a word for the year which is a great idea and the third time I’ve done it.
I rather like being able to focus on a word and the way it shapes the year ahead.
My word has been preparing me, through my own journal writing though I didn’t realize it at the time. Last September I began a study from the book of Proverbs and my focus was on health and how I want to focus on it as I move into my senior years.
I asked myself a question, “What brings health to my body and nourishment to my bones?”
In my post menopausal years I’d think its exercise, good nutrition, clean air and vitamins and I’d likely be right.
However, as a believer, there is more for me ‘to do’ …I am to trust the Lord with all my heart and not lean on my own understanding. That tells me to stop trying to figure out all the details of my life as I am prone to do. Acknowledge God and he will make my paths straight – plural, ‘paths’ – more than one path. That’s exciting. I get variety.
More reading tells me not to be wise just by my own eyes. This means I need more than just my own counsel. I am to fear the Lord and shun evil – stay away from it.
I read, took my notes and acknowledged the gleaned nuggets of truth.
Then I put the journal away and kept on with my daily life.
I was “motoring” along just fine, by attending a fitness class twice per week, played pickleball that much or more, took an occasional beach walk or a tour around my neighborhood and did a little writing. I was even working on a painting project – of the canvas type, not a house renovation.
Facilitating a group at Freedom Session, a healing/recovery/discipleship program, was once again part of a weekly commitment – helping myself and helping others.
An upcoming vacation for February 2015 was in the planning stage. I often visualized the trek to join some snowbird friends in the south to go on walks/hikes, golf, play pickleball, swim, soak in a hot tub and repeat often.
The holiday was a BIG deal and I was looking forward to it.
Toward the end of November I was involved in an accident.
Three vehicles – bang!
Here is where the word CHANGE comes into my new year. Am I willing to accept the change – like physiotherapy twice per week, at least once per week massage, twenty minute walks rather than my usual hour, twice per day neck exercises and stretches instead of heading off to play pickleball for two hours? Ice? Heat? Rest? …and this is what I get to repeat.
Am I willing to allow the tears of frustration to come out and then just get on with doing what is before me – put myself in the drivers seat of a car and go – be content with a good book to read instead of going to the gym – accept I am not going on my long awaited vacation?
How am I doing?
I am healing. I’m aware things could have been much worse. I’ve had to check my attitude, fears and self-pity. I’ve gone back to my September journal writing with fresh awareness seeking to make wise decisions, to trust beyond myself and accept I can’t figure out all the details of my current life.
Now it’s time to actively work with the change which is happening whether I willingly participate or not. I choose to participate willingly.
For my writers group I wrote about how I’ve been affected regarding the accident and I believe the process assisted me to get unstuck and here I am, ready to believe good change is possible and is coming.
In future posts I hope to continue to share how I:
adapt to change,
can create change,
can be the change.
I have no idea what all this means but I’m getting ready – after all I do have some extra time on my hands.
How about you? Is there some part of life that is asking you to change? How are you doing?
4 responses to “Time on my Hands”
I am somewhat familiar with life thowing curveballs – I think what you have shared in regards to coming to terms with your new situation – I call the “grace of inner acceptance.” That is not to be churchy or cute; it comes from fighting wars and battling self and letting go. All the best to you in dealing with ongoing changes. K. :o)
Thanks for your comment ‘k’ I’m glad you stopped by….
I can certainly relate to how challenging life becomes when, instead of doing all that we think is important, we have to look after our physical well being! A frustrating journey to be sure, but also a time for refinement.
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Wishing you fast healing, Valerie.